Excerpt from Addison's Pregnancy Journal...

12/7/2010

I randomly thought of a memory I have of the day before I found out I was pregnant with you. I was so sick. I laid on the bed in my room...and watched country music videos (something I NEVER do) as your dad took care of the kids. I just couldn’t move, I was so sick!!! So, your daddy deemed it hot dog and french fry night. The kids loved it!!!! Anyway, dad walked in on my watching Country on TV and my face was wet. My eyes were pouring out tears!!! I don’t know what triggered it, but I was insanely emotional...and I felt so sick...I literally thought something was so wrong with me that I might be dying. It’s comical to me now as I think about it. When I finally stopped crying, I walked out of the room and into the kitchen where everyone was enjoying a "dad" meal. I looked outside, and it was absolutely beautiful. It was just about dusk...but the sun was setting. It was kind of a rainy, sunny, sunset. The clouds were neon pink and they cast a peachy glow on everything outside. The soil and rocks were damp from the light rain 10 minutes before and it smelled like the desert outside. It was like a dream. As I enjoyed that moment before I knew you existed, my stomach was churning. I was so naseated!!! But as I felt like hurling, I also enjoyed the smell of the hotdogs and was a little jealous that I wouldn’t be having one. This makes me chuckle a little bit. This is such a vivid memory to me.
Anyway, back to the present. You are such a little mover!!! The difference between you and the other two is your kicks and jabs are very painful! I know I felt a knee last night...I think I mostly feel knees and elbows from you. Occasionally, it feels like someone is massaging my tummy from the inside. When you start moving, it seems like you’re either just having fun kicking around or you just can’t get comfortable. I like to lay on my left side...you don’t seem to like it, though because that’s when I get a lot of knees and elbows. You’re starting to be on a schedule already. You do a lot of acrobatics at 10 PM for about half an hour or so...and again just after midnight until I finally am able to sleep through it...I have to say...with the other two children, the reason I was excited about delivery day (while I was pregnant) was because I wouldn’t be pregnant anymore after they were born!!! With you, though, I’m actually excited to meet you for the first time. To examine you and look you over....to see your pretty eyes and find out if you’re going to be a little blondie or a brunette...a lot of hair or just peach fuzz. I want to kiss your face and smell your newborn baby skin after you’re "milk drunk". I want to hold your fingers and touch your tiny toes...put bows in your hair and cute little footie pj’s on you!! I want to be your mommy. It’s taken me 7 months to realize that I couldn’t imagine life without you. Your brother and sister like to zerbert me on the belly. You get really still when that happens...JJ talks to you a lot. He puts his mouth on my belly like it’s a balloon and I can barely make out the words. It’s pretty funny. He’s going to be a really good big brother for you. Caylee is very affectionate and likes to take care of people...so, I know she’ll want to help me a lot with you! I have to take my gestational diabetes test again in a few days...yuck. And then on Monday, I’ll have an ultrasound to see if my low placenta has moved up. It better have, because I want to push you out. It’s so unnatural to be pulled out of a hole cut by a doctor! That’s one of my fears...Well, I’m almost finished with my tea...and the kids have been in bed for a couple hours...daddy has too! So, I’d better head in that direction.